Have you ever heard the expression that work-life balance is a complete myth? Sometimes I wonder if it is, and sometimes I’m sure it’s not. We need to work towards balance and sanity. And what works for me may not work for you.
Here are five tips on how we can get the right balance and the right sanity for each one of us (because one size does not fit all.)
[ctt template=”3″ link=”Xg7DS” via=”yes” ]“One size fits all” doesn’t work on pantyhose, and it doesn’t work for life either![/ctt]
The first tip: look at your work schedule. Tradition says the work day is the 9:00 to 5:00 schedule. I don’t work that schedule, and I’m guessing most of you don’t either. In our head, we often think we’re supposed to. For those of you that start work at 6:30 am, you might think “Oh I’m crazy to start so early!” That is not necessarily true. What is the right work schedule for you?
I wish we did live in that world where we did work a four-hour work week, but we don’t. We need to have work schedules that work for our life. When my children were small, my work schedule was different than it is now. I was with them to get them to school in the morning. Now, I’m in my office a bit earlier in the day. You have to look at the work schedule that makes sense for your commute, for your family, for your children, and for the work that you’re in as well.
For those of you that are self-employed, it may make sense to work in the evenings. It may make sense to work very early in the morning. For those of you that work with a boss that travels a lot, working your schedule around what their time zone is might make sense. Don’t feel the societal pressure to work 9:00 to 5:00 if that schedule isn’t the right schedule for you, and don’t feel that you need to apologize if you work on a schedule that someone else thinks is not right.
My dad thinks I work all the time. I don’t. I work a decent schedule, but he’ll call me up in the middle of the day, because my office is at home, and ask me what I’m doing. I say, “Dad I’m working, what do you think I’m doing?” He thinks I’m at home, therefore I shouldn’t be working. I don’t try to explain to it. He doesn’t understand. I don’t apologize that I’m working in the middle of the day. My work schedule works for my life. If you can arrange your work schedule to work for your life, it gives you some sanity.
The second tip: we need to be better about our own boundaries. Over the last 15 years, we have seen changes to what we do and what we don’t do; what is acceptable and reasonable, and what isn’t. I recently saw a statistic for those in the UK, that the average person in the UK spends 15 minutes a day working on their cell phone in bed. I don’t know about you, but that’s a boundary for me. I don’t bring my cell phone into my bedroom unless I’m traveling when I use it for my alarm clock. When I do, it’s a big temptation to roll over and look at my email. And that’s a boundary for me because I know I shouldn’t.
What are your boundaries? If you have a work phone or you’re self-employed, you can be available at all times. You need to say to yourself “I stop responding to email after 6:00 pm.” Decide for yourself what boundaries makes sense for you. It doesn’t mean you’re not looking at your email after 6:00 pm (maybe that’s not something you’re willing to do,) but you do say to yourself that you don’t respond after 6:00 pm unless it’s an emergency.
For those of you that have a part-time job you work at in the evenings, you need to say to yourself that you will not respond to inquiries while you’re in your day job. You need to have the boundaries that make sense to you. Put boundaries on what you will and will not do. As someone who has wholly blown those boundaries in the past, I can promise you that once you start putting some pretty clear boundaries on what you do, you will get back a lot of your sense of balance and sanity. We need our balance and sanity.
[ctt template=”3″ link=”U02Q2″ via=”yes” ]Balance and Sanity are easier when you have boundaries.[/ctt]
The third tip: know where your energy gains and drains are. There are certain things that are going to make you feel good, and there are certain things that are going to make you feel bad. Perhaps it is what you’re eating. It might be what you’re drinking. It could be what you’re doing. It might be the time of day.
For, instance, some people are sharp and good first thing in the morning. They like to get up a 4:00 am. Some say that 4:00 am is not in the morning. But for some people 4:00 am is in the morning! That’s their energy gain. They work really well early in the morning, but by the time that 4:00 in the afternoon rolls along, they’re drained, they’re exhausted. Maybe you’re the opposite. You’re horrible at 4 o’clock in the morning, but by 4 o’clock in the afternoon, you’re starting to wake up. Maybe you’re somewhere in between.
I know that for me I need to watch the food that I eat because if I eat heavy at lunch, I have a rough afternoon. If I overeat at dinner, I have a rough evening. That is taking away my balance from my personal life. I know that for me food is a big part of my energy gains and drains.
Exercise is another big part for many of us. Given a choice, I’ll exercise first thing in the morning. It gives me the energy throughout the rest of the day. My husband prefers to exercise at the end of the day. That’s where he gets his energy from.
Look at what you’re doing that give you the ups and downs during the day. When is the best time of the day for a meeting for you? It’s probably not 2 o’clock in the afternoon. For some of you, it’s not 9 o’clock in the morning either. And for some of you, it’s not 9 o’clock at night. Watch your energy gains and drains to maintain your balance and sanity.
Which takes us to the fourth point, because I find that a lot of people don’t have much control in their jobs. Why? Because it’s not your business or company. You’re doing things to please your boss or your client. Sometimes people like to put their head in the sand and ignore what is going on around them. If you want to drive yourself crazy quickly, start pretending life isn’t happening to you. You have to acknowledge what’s going on.
You don’t have to tell the whole world about it. Please don’t go to Facebook and post your personal drama there. There’s a fine line between appropriate and inappropriate on Facebook. Your crazy and frustrating life is typically not appropriate for social media. However, you do need to acknowledge your crazy and frustrating life.
[ctt template=”3″ link=”fDK72″ via=”yes” ]Don’t ignore life. Deal with it instead.[/ctt]
Maybe you need to acknowledge it with your partner, with a business partner, a business associate, with a close friend, or with a counselor. Who cares? But don’t stick your head in the sand and say ” This too shall pass.” This too might not pass. You need to deal with it if you want to maintain your sanity and balance. Not live in denial.
The final piece is to remember that life is a marathon, not a sprint. I know we’ve all heard that before, but I’m not sure that we practice it. Let’s look at life as if we’re in it for the long haul. Balance and sanity is 100 percent within your control. You have to put parameters on it. You have to put your expectations on it. You have to have your glasses on so that you see clearly as to what is working and not working for you. Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in all the panic of life. Allow yourself to take control. Keep balance that’s right for you and keeps you sane.
This week keep on the right track by remaining calm.
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Article By, Rhonda Scharf
