At an executive leadership conference recently, the speaker asked the audience a really great question: “What do you wish your boss knew about you?”
The audience became instantly engaged with the question, and it put me on a quest to ask the same of other admins.
My quest turned up a few quite sad answers (as did the question at the event), and revealed that many admins feel their boss doesn’t know them at all.
[ctt template=”3″ link=”46Jd5″ via=”yes” ]What do you wish your boss knew about you? Great answers to a great question.[/ctt]
Effective communication is essential to a successful working relationship. We know that the relationship between an admin and an executive (or boss/supervisor) is an important one, and without good communication, it is destined to fail. Asking this question can help to improve not just our knowledge about each other, but our communication and overall working relationship.
Before I tell you what admins said they’d like their boss to know, I challenge you to ask yourself what other people—your coworkers, your supervisors, your peers—would say they want you to know about them. (After all, it’s one thing to complain that others don’t know these things about us, but do we know them about others?)
“MY NAME.”
The first complaint that came up at the conference was shared by a woman who works in a military setting, where people are addressed by rank. She knew that her executive (a Colonel) did not know her name. He only ever referred to her by her rank. She had worked for the Colonel for seven years, and as you can imagine, she was annoyed that he had never taken a personal enough interest in her to even ask what her name was.
While I’m guessing that most of us do know our coworkers’ names, ask yourself if you know the name of the server in the cafeteria or coffee shop you visit each morning. Do you know the name of the custodial staff in your building, the concierge in your front lobby, the teller at your bank? Take an interest in people, and they will take an interest in you.
While I think that knowing the names of the people we work with is an essential component in a healthy working relationship, other elements make our professional relationships a success as well.
“WHAT APPRECIATION LOOKS LIKE TO ME.”
How they prefer to be recognized and appreciated is also a significant thing to know about the people you work with. Some people need to hear “thank you” (I know I do), and some people need to be told what they have done well. Several admins told me they wish the boss noticed what was done right as often as she noticed what was done wrong. Positive reinforcement is important to motivation for many people. Does your boss know how you prefer your positive reinforcement?
“MY WORK STYLE”
Some time ago, I wrote an article about what type of “work-bird” you are and I still talk about it in my workshops. If you are productive and chatty in the morning—or just the opposite—it matters. My executive was a night owl. He came to work late and wanted to chat. I’m more of a robin/lark; I wanted to get work done first thing in the morning and chat later. My son isn’t a morning person at all, and I’ve learned that in the morning, he doesn’t want me to get conversational with him. He wants to do what he needs to do, and then later, he will circle back and ask how I am.
Does your boss know your work style? Does she know if you are task-oriented, deadline-oriented, are great with details, or if that is a little more effort for you? Have you ever sat down and had a conversation about the different work styles you have, to see if you can find a system that suits both of you?
“WHAT I’M LIKE WHEN I’M STRESSED.”
How we each cope with stress is an important consideration that we should share with others we work with. What does it look like when you are too stressed at work? Can the boss recognize when you’re stressed? Can you recognize it in your executive?
Warren and I work together, as well as being married, and we do know how each of us handles work stress. I get short-tempered and demanding. I can find all the things that haven’t been done and ask why they haven’t been done. That is me when I’m at my maximum capacity. I’m not proud of it, but I’m honest about it with my team. When I start following up on things I don’t regularly follow up on, it’s a sign that I’m feeling overworked, and that my stress level is too high.
Warren gets argumentative and defensive. As you can imagine, if we are both in an overworked state and stressed, things can get pretty explosive. As I become more demanding, he gets more defensive, which makes me more stressed, which makes him more stressed… it can become a big spiral. Fortunately, however, because we have talked about how we react to stress, we can recognize what’s happening and stop things before they get out of control.
Do your boss and coworkers know what overwhelmed looks like for you?
[ctt template=”3″ link=”TyBUA” via=”yes” ]Do your boss and coworkers know what overwhelmed looks like for you?[/ctt]
“BASIC PERSONAL INFORMATION.”
Does your boss know the name of your spouse, your children, your pet? Do you know that information about your boss? Do you want your boss to ask how your weekend was, and does she want you to ask her?
What kind of things do you wish your boss knew about you—and do you know those things about her? It’s a great question to ask yourself, and your boss, for a better working relationship.
